home.

An insert from my journal-

11/8/2021- Two days ago we traveled from Gainsville to Craiova. It was a super tiring travel day. We started by leaving campus around 9 am, got to ATL around 10, and hung out in the airport until our flight at 5 pm. Then we flew to Paris, had a quick layover, but not too quick for us to forget to get some macaroons in the airport, then got on another plane to Bucharest. All of us were completely exhausted; we had been traveling for over 24 hours at that point. I slept the whole flight. Then, we landed and drove for 3 hours to Craiova. 

Yesterday was so good. I slept for 14 hours which was much needed. This house is so homey. That’s something I’ve missed since being on the race thus far.

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For as long as I can remember, my mom has always said,” Home isn’t a house or a town, but home is where your family lives” I never quite understood what this meant seeming as home felt attached to my childhood bedroom and my grandmothers house. These were two places I always felt at home. So familiar. So comfortable. I hated the idea of my grandparents ever moving out of that house or my own family leaving the little, yellow house I grew up in. And then they did. And eventually, so did my grandparents.

At this point in my life, I’ve lived in 4 different houses, each starting foreign but eventually feeling comfortable again. My most recent move was May of 2021. I moved out of my last house and into this one. And then 3 months after, I moved into a tent in Gainsville, GA. Then into a church for two weeks. Then back to Gainsville for a bit, and now I live in eastern Europe. 

There’s been so so much change in my life recently. Change is probably one of the most consistent things I’ve experienced since being on the race. It’s been a huge adjustment. I’d be lying if I said it was easy to let go of control. I’ve found myself craving familiarity in any sense of the word. I needed a place of comfort, a place to call my own, a place of solitude, but this is pretty impossible when you live with 26 other people.

So where would I find my comfort?

In this season, I’ve rested in many places while being here on the- one of my team leaders cars, my tent in gainsville, the sick room in the Adventures in Missions base, the colorful couch in the upperroom of the Mision house here in Romania, or laying in my closest friend’s arms. But as time moves on, these places will never compare to resting in my Father’s presence.

His eternal comfort has been home for me.

His everlasting peace welcomes me in through the back door because I’m a frequent visitor.

His love constantly surrounds me like a friend and holds me fast in the night as I fall asleep and wakes me up sweetly.

I get to live in this great love forever and ever. That’s such a gift that i’m constantly giving praises to the Lord for. He sees me and loves me right where I am. I get to take baby steps with Him as He guides me just like my earthly father did when I was just learning to walk. I’m still learning to walk with Him, but wow, does He make it easy. 

So, yes, home looks different these days. But home isn’t my yellow brick childhood home or in the arms of someone I love. Home is my Father. The savior of the world. The creator. I get to call Him home and He welcomes me in each time with the warmest invite. He calls me daughter, so in Him, my family lives here with Him too.

Thank you, Jesus, for being my secret place and comfort during this season.